Is He Really Over His Ex?

Is He Really Over His Ex?


Ok so he says it’s over, he swears you’re the one that he wants and that she doesn’t compare to you…but there’s still a niggling feeling at the back of your mind when you think about her. If it’s over, then why is her number still in his phone? Why is he still friends with her on Facebook and WHY has he kept all of the photographs of them?


If you’re worried about the depth of feeling between your partner and their ex then you’re not alone. Many people feel upset when they consider the time that their loved one has spent with another but the issues of what contact is kept up between them is a sore one for many!  If you are uncomfortable about the way your partner has kept in touch with their ex, you may need to look at the amount of contact they’re having before you decide that the ex is a threat!


Red flags

Sometimes there are too many signs that your ex is still harbouring feelings for their ex to ignore. You might be feeling threatened with good reason. Some red flags to watch out for are as follows.

  • Do they keep their mobile with them all the time and guard it closely?
  • Are they still swapping private messages on Facebook or other networking sites?
  • Is he defensive of her?
  • Does he talk about her too much? Otherwise known as “Mentionitis” this is a sign that the ex is still on his mind!


If you’ve noticed any of the above and thought that there was “something going on” then you might not be barking up the wrong tree! Asking your partner outright if they are still in love with their ex is a bad idea because it will only result in a resounding “No of course not!”…this is when you have to be a bit wilier than the next girl!


How to make sure he doesn’t still love his ex

So you can’t ask outright but what you can do is a little bit of puppetry! Arrange a party or get together and if the ex is in your social circle, be sure to invite her too! Make sure she brings a date and watch your partner closely. Jealousy is obvious; if he’s looking at his ex and her date just that little bit too much then your insecurities are probably well founded.


When we are genuinely over someone, seeing them with a new partner doesn’t affect us at all. It’s simply not something which bothers us and this is why you should observe your partner closely when his ex is with a new man.


If she hasn’t got a man yet, you can mention that you’ve heard on the grapevine that she’s dating someone new…ok so it’s a little white lie…but gossip is often unfounded anyway so what’s the harm? His reaction will tell you a lot; is he mildly interested but not really bothered? Or is he just that little bit too interested? Does he question you further about the details? If so, once more you need to think again about your relationship.


It’s no fun being with someone who still has feelings for their ex. Once you know for sure that he’s still thinking about her then you can decide to cut your losses and put it down to experience. Although it’s painful, staying with someone who hasn’t got strong feelings for you can be worse!


So if the worst happens and you are convinced that he’s still got feelings for her, let him know the reasons behind your re-thinking of your relationship. If he’s got any sense, he’ll realise what he’s about to lose and get over her pronto!





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