Love is a complex and beautiful state of being; it’s not something which is easily boxed off into one category, instead there are many, many differing types and depths of it. The love you feel for one person is different to that which you feel for another because it’s inspired by different things. You might love your Gran a lot but it’s not the same sort of love you’ve always harboured for your best female friend…or for the girl of your dreams. We might fall in love multiple times over our lifetime or just once; either way when it’s unrequited it’s a very traumatic experience indeed; this is why psychological tricks can come in very handy as you navigate the world of love!
If you’re in love with your partner and not sure if she feels the same way, you might be looking for ways in which to inspire that love to bloom. You may be thinking up all kinds of ruses to “make her” love you when in fact, it’s not that hard. There are certain tricks or techniques to make someone fall in love with you and which can also be employed to help change the way someone feels about you…they don’t tend to involve magic but simply psychology. Read on to learn the six psychological tricks that can help your loved one to return the feelings.
1: Filling the gap; when we fall in love with someone else, it’s partly because they seem to represent something which is lacking in our lives. They fill the gap; now because everyone’s “gap” is different, this isn’t so easy to pin down but once you do, you can then present your loved one with what they are looking for in a person. The gap is usually what we aren’t…or put more simply, we look in others for the attributes which we wish we had. So if your object of affection is rather giddy and not particularly organised, be the person who helps her in moments of crisis or disorganisation…if she’s the sensible type, be the person to inspire her to have more fun. These actions will allow her to see you as someone she needs in her life which in turn will add to the love she feels for you.
2: Meet the right criteria; we all have preconceived ideas about who our life partner should be. We’re not always even aware of these preconceptions because they’ve been created over a lifetime. Usually, our parents will provide us with a model relationship…if your parents were a traditional family with a working Father and a stay at home Mother, the chances are this is the set-up you will aspire to for your own family. Equally, if you had parents who were both drive, ambitious professionals then that’s what you’ll imagine for your future. Look to your loved-one’s parents…what was their set-up? Let her see that you have the same ideals…but be sure that you really do share them or you’ll be barking up the wrong tree!
3: Allow her to rely on you; this means being there for her. All girls and women want a man who is reliable. This means that they know they can call on you at any time for anything. Let her know that you are there for her in every way. She’s stuck at the train station at midnight? Be there for her. Allow her to know that you have her best interests at heart and that you want to help take care of her.
4: Let her know you want her to win; this is an important one. Girls and women will always love the people who are gunning for them. If she knows that you are thinking about her when she’s got an exam or an important interview, then she’ll think of you more fondly. People equate this sort of love with their parents and our parents are our very first model for what love is and how it manifests itself. When you know that she has a challenge, send her a text or an email or better still some flowers to let her know that you’re right behind her and you know she can do it. When she sees that you have faith in her, she’ll love you for it.
5: Make friends with her friends; not in a creepy “I want a piece of all your life” way but in a way that she’s comfortable with. Be nice to her friends as they are your most important allies in the battle for her heart. If they approve of you, they’ll tell her so!
6: Don’t be too available; yes, you’ve got to get the balance right. It’s all very well being available for her in a crisis but no girl likes a total pushover. Ensure she knows that you have friends and a social life aside from her. Allow her to see that other people admire and like you too. Work on yourself and your own ambitions and be the best you can at all you do. She’s far more likely to see you as a desirable partner to love if you love yourself.
Love isn’t always easy…we can find ourselves falling in love at the most inconvenient times but it’s possible to manage the rocky road to some extent. Take care of yourself and be your own greatest advocate and you will be more lovable for it.
Nicholas Boothman, author of How to Make Someone Fall in Love With You in 90 Minutes or Less shows how to find and meet the love of your life—and have that person fall in love with you—in a mere 90 minutes, or approximately the time it takes to have a first dinner date. Now in paperback, this follow-up to his bestselling How to Make Someone Like You in 90 Seconds or Less is updated throughout with information on Internet dating, bringing together all of Mr. Boothman’s considerable interpersonal skills to the problem of finding lasting love, fast.
With chapters on What is Love? Who Will Complete You? Approaching Strangers, and The Art of Flirting, this book covers all the essentials, however it should not be over-looked for its ability to teach us a little about the power of first impressions, human interaction and behaviour. It is analytical in its approach and you will learn a lot about yourself as well as others. Also available on Kindle